Famous Lawyer Misquotes 

1.  Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he
    doesn't know about it until the next morning?

2.  The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?

3.  Were you alone, or by yourself?

4.  Were you present when your picture was taken?

5.  Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?

6.  Did he kill you?

7.  How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?

8.  You were there until the time you left, is that true?

9.  How many times have you committed suicide?

10. Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was Aug. 8?
        A: Yes.
        Q: And what were you doing at that time?

11. Q: She had three children, right?
        A: Yes.
        Q: How many were boys?
        None.
        Q: Were there any girls?
      
12. Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
        A: Yes.
       Q: And these stairs, did they go also?

13. Q: Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon didn't you?
        A: I went to Europe, Sir.
       Q: And you took your new wife?

14. Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
        A: By death
       Q: And by who's death was it terminated?

15. Q: Can you describe the individual?
        A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
       Q: Was this a male or female?

16. Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition 
       notice which I sent to your attorney?
        A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

17. Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
        A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

18. Q: All your response must be oral, OK?  What school did you go to?
        A: Oral

19. Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
        A: The autopsy started around 8:30p.m.
         Q: And, Mr. Dennington was dead at that time?
        A: No, you dummy, he was sitting on the table wondering
        why I was doing an autopsy.

20. Q: You were not shot in the fracas?
        A: No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel.

21. Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
        A: I have been since early childhood.